Euge Two

D'OH! 11 Scratch Team 1

For the third time this year our scheduled opposition failed to show up. The organisers managed to persuade a team who had just played to stay on and give us a game so at least we had a run around. It was not ideal, but the lads settled into the task and it wasn't long before the scoreboard started to flip over as the goals rolled in. Lobby kicked us off and then the goals were shared around as we raced to an 8-0 lead. It was like taking candy from a baby. Then a disaster as we conceded one against the run of play. At this point Euge decided that the time was right to strut his stuff on the court rather than in nets.

It wasn't long before he had added to our goal tally with a long range effort after their goalie was caught out of position. So now Euge has two goals in his 209 game career and no doubt one of the best goals-per-minute-on-the-court record.

For the record, Lobby and the skipper grabbed hattricks and Neil and Kev two each to add to Euge's cameo.

Next week's game is at 7.20pm against the Teabaggers.

Let me know if you want to be part of it.

(17-NOV-2008)

Raining Goals

D'OH! 13 Sons of Reg Grundy's 4

It's been a long time since we had a 'day out' like this - and we enjoyed it. There was the Grand Final against Computershare when we went 8-0 up before half time before cruising to a 12-2 win which was very similar to this - but that was at the end of 2005. Anyway once again we were up 8-0 at half time and giggling like schoolboys at the way everything we tried seemed to work. Trev had scored two unlikely goals from acute angles, Sadds already had a hattrick, the skipper two and Lobby was on the board as well. Trev's first came from a run down the left. He seemed to have left it too late and lost the angle, but his shot was true and the keeper was beaten. Later Neil pushed a freekick down the other flank for Trev to run on to. Again it appeared that Trev had let the ball run on too long but when he shot he surprised everyone by picking up a goal.

Sadds played a one-two with the skipper for his first before knocking in a left footed one and then slamming in a goal with his right. The skipper notched one with the trusted toe-poke before beating a defender and then the keeper.

At half time there was a cheery mood in the camp until Neil suggested that we would probably keep a clean sheet - we all know what happens when someone suggests that - we always concede a quick goal after half time. Euge's eyes rolled to the ceiling as he realised that Neil had now mozzed the clean sheet Euge was hoping for.

Well it didn't quite work out in the normal way, as Neil's pressure on the defence caused their bloke to pass across the goal to Lobby who gratefully accepted the chance. It wasn't long before Neil's run into the danger area sent the ball into the path of a luckless defender who steered the ball in off the skipper's sole. Lobby found an acute angle on the left and 'did a Trev' and it was raining goals still and it had to stop. Soon we lost our intensity and they discovered that they could play a bit after all. Bizarrely though it was Trev who stepped up to put a couple past Euge. The second one quite odd, as Trev came on as sub and ran straight towards our goal, inadvertently collecting a ricochet and burying it in his own net with his customary aplomb.

It was not over at the other end as the skipper slotted one to the corner and Sadds smashed a rebound from an awkward height. An even better goal was on the cards as he took aim again with a volley but this time it swerved just past the post.

So a huge win and a good boost after last week's close defeat. Next week's game is at 6.40pm against a team called Rusty Trumpets. Not sure what to expect there. Kev if you are available Sadds is ready to sit this one out.

(10-NOV-2008)

Done by De Canio

D'OH! 2 The Reds 3

We were scheduled to play The Reds, but when the opposition turned up in blue tops we could be forgiven for thinking we were playing someone else. The flow of the game and the scoreline also suggested we were not playing the same team that we saw off 13-5 in May when we last played a team called The Reds. It was a good close game but with more chances than the scoreline suggested. Trev and Sadds (twice?) both saw efforts come back off the post and the skippers' freekick fizzed past the upright on the wrong side. Plaino positioned himself perfectly for a header on the far post but could not convert and there was lots of other goalmouth action too.

It was not all at our end as The Euge showed his wares to keep the opposition at bay. Can't recall which team scored first but for us it was Plaino to tap in after the Skipper did all the work including dealing with the 'keeper. In the second half Sadds did even more, beating a couple and then jagging the ball back from the line for Trev to finish off for our second. With goals like that you would have expected more on the night. As it was a couple of defensive lapses and it was all square entering the final few minutes. As time ran out and a draw seemed the most likely and let's face it, the fairest result, their bloke (the one with specs on) chases a bouncing ball down the left hand side and then launches into the Paulo De Canio-style hop and shot (crossing legs in mid-air) and sends the ball with his right boot past a goggle-eyed Euge who had no inkling that this player could produce something so audacious. It was a truly stunning moment.

None of us could emulate that and we succumbed to another defeat - our fourth in five. Tonight's game is at 7.20pm and there will be no Plaino. Sorry to say that Plaino has got another bout of glandular fever and is likely out until the new year. We wish him all the best for a speedy recovery.

Let me know if you are available.

(03-NOV-2008)

Round 1 Win

D'OH! 6 BLL 2

A nice start to the season and a chance to catch up with an old foe - Richard Butt who has been off the scene for 3-4 years. Richard played for us a couple of times a few years back and against us a few times before that and was always a good bloke and a good competitor. The stats tell that he made his debut for D'OH! in September 1999 and played again in April 2000 - which places both his appearances in the D'OH! period PE (Pre the Euge) and predates Trev and Lobby's debuts as well. Not only that but Sadds' first debut was also after Richard last played for us - no wonder that no-one other than me recognised him. Richard started in goal and made some smart saves as we swarmed forward. Once their regular keeper arrived he played some lively stuff and should have scored more than the one goal.

Played at a brisk pace this game was enjoyable for all concerned as there was plenty of action at both ends and in the middle and we showed ourselves to be equally good at making mistakes as our opponents. The Skipper led the way in this department with a dazzling display of cock-ups especially at the start of the game, and with a more capable opposition and a less capable keeper, we would have been well down by half time.

We've written before about Euge's shot stopping prowess and he was tested this week as one of their players had a potent left foot. Happy to let a few whistle past the frame of the goal, Euge had to get in the way of some and it is rare that you see any complaint from our legend but his fingers were stinging a couple of times. In front of goal there was a scramble and surely they had to score after Euge was prone having made a couple of saves already. Strange as it may sound, Euge made a lunging save of such speed that it was hard to say for sure that anyone had seen it, but the evidence was that the goal-bound ball was now round the post and everyone was congratulating him. Astonishing stuff.

As usual Lobby opened the scoring to relieve the tension and then the Skipper put Trev in the clear for a lovely finish. Trev added to his tally before the break as we turned with a 3-1 advantage and lots of hope that we could pull away in the second half. We played alright but didn't put the chances away. Trev completed his hattrick before Lobby showed us a great piece of skill to set up Neil. Euge bowled it long to Lobby with his back to goal. Controlling the awkwardly bouncing ball with apparent ease, Lobby flicked it invitingly into Neil's path and Neil made no mistake from the left, with his left. Lobby reflected afterwards that it was the sort of piece of play which comes along rarely and perhaps he should retire having done it? I am not reading too much into his lack of availability for this week after one of his best games ever.

Sadds was back for us and completed the scoring after a few others had had a go and failed. His clinical disposal of the pesky ball was good to see.

This week's game is at 8pm.

(27-OCT-2008)

Foosballing Lesson Part 2

D'OH! 3 Foosballers 8

They said it couldn't be done.
They said that we would be out of the finals at the first hurdle.
They said that our battling team would be washed away on a tide of foosballing genius.
They said that we would not be able to score enough goals.
They said we were too old and too slow.

They were right on all counts.

We struggled against this outfit and over a beer in the pub afterwards (with apologies to our sponsors it was not our sponsors' pub) we were able to agree that they were the best opposition we had ever played against, probably.

Bright spots were Kev's goal from a corner kick which went skidding into the bottom corner and a late consolation penalty for the same player. In the second half we did produce the move that led (in our modest opinion) to the best goal of the match as all players had a hand (or rather foot) in it. The move saw the ball swept briskly out of defence from Neil to Giles to Trev who surged forward and found Lobby on the left. Lobby's finish was just what was needed and there was exhilaration all around as we congratulated each other on such a great piece of play. From the kick off they immediately struck an unstoppable shot straight into the top corner for a goal which was not only stunning of itself, but completely deflated our team as we appeared to have been punished for enjoying our own effort so much. We never got it together again after that.

So that's it. Our hope being that Foosballers go and play in Division One and leave us to play teams with standard levels of talent in them. The scary thing was that they appeared to have other gears that were not required when playing against us.

This week the new season starts with an 8.40pm kick off. With Kev having injured his ankle and Plaino not available either, there is space in the team for anyone sho is interested. Please let me know if you are playing. Sadds do you fancy a run tonight?

(13-OCT-2008)

Lucky You're With AAMI

D'OH! 3 AAMI 7

A final round defeat and 4th spot secured for the upcoming finals series. In fact we will need to do well to make it a 'series' as we have to get past Foosballers to play more than one game. They await us on Monday night at 7.20pm in our latest bid for some plasticware.

We were a better side this week and we let a few late ones in as we pressed forward in a desperate attempt to get back on terms after we had fallen behind 3-0 in the first half. We made some good chances and their keeper had made some excellent saves - especially an early one off Lobby who worried the defence and one at point blank range from Trev. Then the post and the side netting got involved as Kev and Trev had further efforts that should have surely led to something better.

We had made some stuff ups in defence though that had been costly and for the second game in a row we were punished severely for our lapses. They did not tackle particularly enthusiastically and this gave us hope but still we could not score. In the second half the skipper went on a mazy run but then poked the wrong side of the post and it appeared it would end badly for us. Then things improved as Trev harried their defence into a terrible blunder resulting in a back pass own goal and at least we had something to show for our efforts.

Then Lobby got some space on the left side and the previously excellent keeper could not hold onto the shot and ended up spilling the effort into the net for our second. In our last unlikely hurrah, Plaino had a hopeful shot that was surely heading wide before the keeper managed to bundle the fairly innocuous looking effort into the net as well for our third. Euge had a good game and thank goodness he did, showing us the trademark one handed reflex save that continues to delight us. Despite his efforts we conceded too many and our ageing and slow defensive line was found out again.

On a brighter note one of their players was sin-binned for a couple of minutes in the first half, for answering back and then for answering back again after being booked for answering back the first time. He cooled his heels even after the 2 minutes ran out as his mates decided he would benefit from an extended break from the fray.

Congratulations to Kev who passed the 50 game milestone this week in very good time. Kev has certainly been a regular and welcome fixture since his debut in May 2007 having missed only 7 games since then.

(06-OCT-2008)

A Foosball Lesson

D'OH! 4 Foosballers 10

These guys knew how to play and it is hard to remember a better display of clinical finishing. We held our own for much of the first half although we worked really hard for our goals and they just strung some passes together and Bang! Bang! They had a couple of goals. Lobby opened the scoring for us with a crisp finish, then got the next as well as he got the better of the defence in a goal mouth scramble. After the skipper scored from the penalty spot and then again shortly after with a shot off the left, it looked good for us. We didn't score after that. They stood off us and then as we advanced, they won the ball by being quicker to intercept the ball or because our passing was not inch perfect. It seemed that each time they attacked they scored and even Euge had little to offer as their shots found their way past him. These guys would surely dominate in Division One and the sooner they go there the better. Characteristically we continued to work hard even in the face of inevitable defeat. Kev and Lobby had some pot-shots and Neil tackled back manfully to snuff out at least some of their attacks. Plaino rumbled around looking for a spot to make a decisive impression on the game but like the rest of us struggled in the face of superior pace and skill.

This week's game is at 6.40pm against AAMI. After the bye , this is our last game of the regular season and barring some stuff-up with the computer we should have a finals game the week after that. Hopefully it is not against Foosballers!

(22-SEP-2008)

Trev is Back

D'OH! 8 Sons of Reg Grundy's 3

The lads are travelling well as the finals approach and now we have won three in a row scoring 24 goals to nine conceded. This was a sound performance and made most enjoyable by Trev's return to the team and an awesome display of finishing by the wizard. In the first half it was the Trev showcase as he found his way to goal and found the net to the dismay of would-be defenders. One turn and shot was particularly well executed as Trev cleverly shielded the ball from his man so that it appeared there was nothing that could have prevented the goal. We also saw the toe-poke used to great effect and it was like Trev had not been away rather than having missed the previous five matches. Lobby was on song as he fed out a stream of effective passes and Plaino covered a lot of ground doing good work up front and in defence. Kev was his usual ebullient self and the Euge was so effective he conceded just three on the night.

The ref did not have such a good game although in the context of a lack of contest, it didn't matter much. At one stage he disappeared into the end section of the pits to fiddle with a troublesome cleaning machine and managed to disengage the hose and cover the area with soapy water. As the game progressed he seemed to become more and more obsessed with the problem of the cleaning machine so that he was distracted and unable to give decisions. After at one stage admitting he was not watching the game, he later tried to defend himself against criticism of slackness, only to concede that we deserved better.

The lads tracked back particularly well on the night to help Euge out and while most of the time he doesn't need us, I know he appreciates us making the effort. On one occasion I found himself in the last line of defence after Euge had made a sprawling save. It appeared that as the ball fell at the attacker's feet he would surely drill straight at me and a certain trepidation came into my mind. I need not have worried. As the shot came in, the space between me and the attacker was magically filled with Euge's torso and his hand beat the shot away with contempt.

As their defence disintegrated Lobby's great pass sent the skipper to the line and his pull back was dispatched by Trev for a clinical goal to add to the tally. At the end the skipper's speculative kick-in was helped into the net by a defender rushing to beat Kev to the ball and they were in disarray and at each other.

Next week's game is against Foosballers and is at the exciting kick off time of 10:40pm. I know how much I we all look forward to those. Then we have a week off before the final round of the season

(15-SEP-2008)

Good for the goal difference

D'OH! 12 Lightning Strikes 3

It was good to get a few regulars back into the engine room and Kev and Lobby marked their returns with hat tricks. The opposition was not up to much and we cruised after half time to our third victory against this opposition and our third comfortable one.

In the early part the skipper and Kev profited most from our forays forward and the skipper had a hat trick before the break while Kev had the other two of our 5 to their 2. Kev's second a stunner whatever way you looked at it. Whether it curved or not, it still found the far top corner just a moment after leaving his boot and Kev was very happy with it as his ecstatic gesture to the non-existent crowd testified. In the second half a bit of a procession was made and everyone had fun. Kev completed his hat trick and Neil bagged a couple. Plaino got on the scoresheet as well before Lobby got in on the act and picked up his three as the life ebbed from the game.

In the end, the talking point of the second half came at the death when Euge conceded an unlikely goal at his near post direct from a corner to spoil his effort to keep a clean sheet for the half.

This week's game is at 7.20pm against Sons of Reg Grundy's. We are in fourth spot with just four rounds to go and one of those a bye. So not many chances to cement our spot in the finals. Let's make it count tonight.

(08-SEP-2008)

Better than Perfect

D'OH! 4 Perfecto 3

In the end we wore them down and the fact that they only had 4 players and we had 6 began to tell. Even their superior skill level could not keep them ahead of us after we nibbled away at their 2-0 half time lead. You always fancy your chances playing against a team a man short. On our side we lined up with no Euge, no Lobby, no Trev and no Kev which evened things up a bit. The good news was that we had Sadds back to play his first game since late April and he buzzed around with his usual enthusiasm. Neil had done some great recruiting during the day and showed up with Dave and Matt who both made excellent first up contributions. So it turned out that after a shaky start and with no regular keeper, we could hold them, then match them and finally beat them when they got bored of trying to chase us.

They are top of the table and when they had the ball at their feet you could see why. They did some tricky things (like beating two of us at once) which meant that they made plenty of chances and stuck two away. Their keeper was flinging himself about and we were finding him very hard to beat. Sadds lined them up from distance quite a few times as we struggled to breakdown their zone defence but with no luck. We stuck at it and in the second half it was Dave who was the one who finally broke our duck. Then Matt scored with a sharp first time shot after the skipper's shot came back off a post. Dave was the scorer again when he hit it sweetly from outside the D and we had worked out how to profit against them.

Plaino latched on to a cross and his shot beat the keeper but slammed against the underside of the crossbar and out to keep it at 3-3. Then Sadds menaced their keeper into an error and the keeper's clearance deflected off Sadd's right boot into the net for the winner.

Next week's game is at 8.40pm against the Lightning Strikes. Get your reply in early if you want to play as the squad is growing and there are a lot of keen players around!

(01-SEP-2008)

Euge's milestone match

D'OH! 2 Albert Park Rangers 5

With Lobby away, Trev unavailable and Neil facing deadlines at work we needed Euge to produce a mate Yani, in order for us to field a full team. Without some regulars and without a sub, we were always going to struggle a bit, but early on we dominated and had a heap of chances that we could not convert. Yani was late so Steve from Junior Bananas filled in a played some nice stuff and should have scored a couple of times. When Yani showed up he quickly got boot to ball and the next moment was closing in on goal as the cross came over and could have had a dream start to his D'OH! Career. Instead the shot went wide and we had still not scored. Then Euge bowled one down the wing for the skipper to run on to and his shot found the far corner and at last we were on the board.

At half time there was not much in it, but we were puffing as fitness is not our strong suit. With the advantage of the sub they started to take control in the second half as the game became harder and harder for us. Kev produced a goal but their keeper continued to surprise with his ability to get part of his body to the ball and the post and bar did the rest to frustrate us. We leaked at the back and Euge saw plenty of action. There is usually a save that sticks in the memory and last week was no exception. Having hit the deck to block the initial thrust, it was clear to most observers that Euge was in no position to stop the attacker from scoring but Euge had other ideas. As the shot came in an arm and a hand shot up and parried it away for yet another miracle from the 200 gamer.


A pity then that we could not mark Euge's landmark game with a win but at least we were able to go the pub with Euge and have a few beers with him. Euge is now the third most capped D'OH! Player behind the skipper and Simon Jennings after moving ahead of Steve Penny who has been stranded in the high 190s for a couple of years. Now Euge has Simon in his sights and all being well will move into second place before the end of this year. As it happens, Euge will not make an appearance this week because of other commitments.


With Kev now injured, things are looking tight so it will be all hands. Sadds it would be great to have you play if you can.

(25-AUG-2008)

Late Night Draw

D'OH! 6 Jackson 5 6

This was pretty exciting although as Lobby pointed out, we would have enjoyed things more if we had had a sub. Lobby himself grabbed an excellent hat trick and there was splendid drama as we trailed by 2 with not long to go and managed to get back on terms. In the end it would have been tough on either side to lose, so a draw was fair, as is the cliché. Lobby got the first when really there was not much on. With the skipper shepherding the defender near the corner, Lobby harried from the other side and emerged from the corner zone with the ball before banging it under the keeper through an acute angle for a great start. Not much later the skipper robbed the same defender on half way and drove home firmly with his left to double the lead.

Euge played despite being off work during the day and was probably not at his best. A few that you would normally expect him to save slipped past him but of course he kept out a lot too and it was a huge relief for the rest of us that we did not have to do a spell between the sticks. The game started to ebb and flow and in the second half they started to gain an ascendancy on the scoreboard. Kev won a tackle on the wing and sent the ball long to Lobby who was unmarked further down the flank. Lobby did the rest.

Still buzzing after that precise finish, Lobby then played pivot as the skipper moved forward and received the return pass to slam it high into the net. Very much game-on. Lobby worked his way to the by-line and dragged it back to Plaino in the perfect position about a metre out. The build up demanded a goal, but unfortunately Plaino could not quite get a foot on it. Lobby vented his frustration with a rare (for him) swear word.

Their keeper had been quite adventurous all night and now Lobby found him out by intercepting a pass near halfway and curling the ball into the unguarded net. We were now one down with not much time to play. We won a corner and Kev received the pass with plenty of defenders around him. Swivelling deftly, Kev then ripped the ball into the roof of the net for a goal that clearly delighted him (and why not?) and brought us level with seconds to play.

That was it. The elation of playing in an exciting game quickly wears off when you realise that it is 11.20pm on a Monday night and you still have to wind down after the game.

Next week the game is at a more civilised time of 7.20pm against Albert Park Rangers. Euge will play his 200th game so let's put in a big one for the Euge.

(18-AUG-2008)

The Kevin Seward Show

D'OH! 5 Five Ten 2

It's always good to report an outstanding individual effort, especially during the Olympics. Last Monday was Kev's night as he had the Midas touch and scored all our goals. Firstly he robbed a defender and slotted home. Next he stepped up to take a freekick and blasted it through the wall and although the 'keeper did well to get various body parts behind it, he was unable to prevent it going over the line. Not long later, Kev burst through again and perhaps sensing that this was going to be a good night, shot early and aided by a slight deflection watched with delight as his shot found the bottom corner for his hattrick. The first half was not yet over but there was another goal to come as Neil pulled the corner back for Kev who met it sweetly and sent it into the far side of the goal.

At the other end we had let a couple in - the skipper's poorly weighted pass cost us the first one as we started shakily. Not too much damage was done and we turned at halftime with a lead and Kev bubbling.

In the second half things settled down a bit and Kev eased off the accelarator. Both teams made a few chances but Euge was generally untroubled and having conceded two in the first half he did not let another in.

Finally we added to our half time total. Lobby pulled the ball across and the skipper's initial shot was well saved. The ball squeezed out of the keeper's grasp and you might have thought that the lurking player at the far post would be Plaino. Not so! It was Kev and he dinked the keeper for another goal and a message to the rest that they were unlikely to find the net tonight. So the rest of us laboured for no scoreboard reward but it's always good to be part of a winning team so there were no complaints.

This week's game is at the dreaded 10.40pm kick off time and let's hope the opposition are even less enthusiastic than we are. We also hope Trev's concussion has passed so that he can take his place. As I write there is a doubt over Euge who is off work sick today. Not only does this mean we will need all hands to help out, it also means we need to take a turn in nets, something that many of us dread.

(11-AUG-2008)

Who do you call AAMI

D'OH! 5 AAMI 6

Well the report finally has been written from two weeks ago. With a six o'clock kick off we struggled to get a team on the field. Skipper was on leave in Fiji and with Lobby out due to the early start, we also had to put up with the age of technology (Aust Post blocking my email on game time a few days earlier)

We firstly had to get Kev a kit and $10 pair of shoes and the rest of the team there by 6. This happened even though Neil did miss the start by 10 min we went to the break level at 4-4 not a bad effort. Trev claimed two and Plaino the other two at this stage we thought we had a chance.

But with some second half argy bargy, Trev somehow gave away a penalty which we thought was unfair considering that at the other end Kev copped a similar foul which only earned a free. Any way they got a second in the half, thanks to a header from Trev, who in the first half deflected a neat shot past yours truly for his tally of goals conceded or scored to top 5 for the match pity it was 3 for them.

Anyway Kev chimed in our fifth late in the half and his first in cheap boots. Seeing we all have last weeks report and with the proper boots Kev can really hurt a team with his right boot.

Any way we keep kicking

So keep your eye on the reports for the remainder of the season to see if we can make to our first B Division final later this year

(04-AUG-2008)

Revenge of the Toe-Poke

D'OH! 5 Raumplan 1

Same result as last time out but a different game. Once again we found ourselves without an opposition when the start time rolled over, but this time they showed up and a conventional game ensued.

It was a surprise that Kev failed to score given his form from the previous week and his sweet strikes during the warm-up. Lobby broke the deadlock as he has done so often with a nicely taken goal. Trev blazed a trail in the first half and it was a mystery that his efforts went unrewarded as well until very late in the half - he took the defence on and brought a couple of good saves from the keeper as well as missing the target a couple of times before finally burying a chance with a toe-poke. With a defence as unwilling to tackle as this one, we felt very optimistic at half time even though we had only a slender lead.

Lobby chimed in with a toe-poke in the second period for his second when we started to turn our domination into results on the scoreboard. Plaino put away a chance with uncharacteristic aplomb and the skipper toe-poked one after Trev's ingenius pass found him unmarked close to goal.

But for their 'keeper we would have had a lot more. Our 'keeper made his usual contribution and Euge always gives us something to remember. Before they finally scored, the opposition enjoyed some action close to goal. One of their blokes took a shot which rebounded to him off the post. With Euge now out of position it seemed a formality for the attacker to score, but when he shot towards goal, Euge somehow managed to scramble it away with a heart-stopping left handed lunge and the clean-sheet was still possible.

No game this week because of the bye, and in the next few days Euge will let everyone know what time next week's game is (the draw has not been announced yet).

(21-JUL-2008)

We'll Take the Points, Thanks

D'OH! 5 The Other Team 1

This was supposed to be a 10.40pm kickoff so when we got the call that the time was changed to 10pm, no-one was complaining. It was only after arriving at the venue that the organisers explained that the other team were working on the original timeframe so would we like to wait and play them, or take the points and try and find another team to play. Faced with the opportunity to do the right thing and wait for the real opposition, your skipper opted to take the points and play a game against a team from a lower division that had just completed one.

It took ages for us to break them down and it was actually a very enjoyable game of free-flowing football. They did really well considering they had already played once, but they did have 7 so they had some puff left. Euge spent as much time with the ball at his feet as he did with the ball in his hands and was only beaten once and that thanks to a deflection. At the other end it was Kev who opened the scoring, chipping his kick-in onto the head of a hapless defender who failed to realise he was part of Kev's master plan to get the ball into the back of the net. Sure enough the ball bounced off the unlucky bloke's scone and into the top corner for a terrific goal only at the wrong end. Kev backed up with a more conventional effort to continue his impressive record of scoring in pairs rather than scoring individually or rarely or never like some of the rest of us.

In the second half we nursed our advantage until Kev blasted a lay-off from a free kick with venom into the net for a goal that had authority written all over it. I have a feeling Kev got the next as well in what was quite a night for the young man, before the best move of the match saw Lobby and Neil combine superbly. With the defence cut to ribbons, Neil's momentum got the ball past the keeper and to the skipper's feet for a simple tap-in.

A big thank you to the other guys who gave us a great game and stayed behind when it would have been easy not to bother.

Next week our game is scheduled for 8pm against Raumplan.

(14-JUL-2008)

Lightning Fails to Strike

D'OH! 7 Lightning Strikes 3

Cruised to a 5-1 half time lead and let complacency sink in. A nice double from Kev was the only scoring in the second half as we drew that part of the match with a team who will surely struggle in this division. Trev and Lobby got pairs of goals in the opening half, the highlight of which was Plaino's assist. Playing deep in attack, Plaino was targetted by Euge's long throw out. Unlikely as it sounds, Plaino controlled the bouncing ball, held it up and then fed it into the path of Lobby who gratefully accepted the chance to score. A soccer player could hardly have done it better. Trev stuck his second away after the skipper's mazy run and the skipper himself added the final goal of the half when he touched on another of Euge's well directed throws, to beat the on-coming keeper. It was all too easy and they were hardly causing us too much anxiety in defence.

Our biggest problem appeared to be in achieving continuity as we had 7 players in attendance when 6 is the accepted optimum. The double changes did not help us but it was a good night to have that problem.

The coming Monday's game is at 10.40pm and I am not expecting to be stampeded by eager participants. I could be wrong of course.

Let me know if you are playing against the Sons of Reg Grundy's.

(07-JUL-08)

Not so Perfect

D'OH! 3 The Perfects 6

We did not enjoy losing to this lot of bad tempered hot heads. A few of their challenges late in the game would normally have led to bookings or at least freekicks, but by that time the result was settled and the ref maybe felt that he had pushed it already having upset them earlier in the game with some of his decisions.

We had lots of the ball and in the first half made them pay for some lazy defending by scoring 3 goals. We should have got more. In the second half we could not find the net and they continued to do so - they won the second half 3-0 and, with that, the match. With Lobby back in the side our shape was better and he bagged the third goal after being put through by the skipper. Trev probably got the other two, but Neil did some useful work and Plaino was always lurking. Euge kept the scoreline respectable on a busy night with hands and feet. A normal performance for him. Once they took a bit more care at the back we struggled to make inroads and we will need to recover some form pretty quickly.

With Trev and Neil missing the start we grabbed Abdi from the sidelines to make up the numbers and he started brightly. He pounced on a couple of the early defensive lapses but didn't find the net. Later we found him playing on one of the other courts so it looks as though he touts himself around. Good for him.

This week's game is at 8pm again.

(30-JUN-08)

Beware of the Dog

D'OH! 3 Bulldogs 6

So we got bundled out of the finals by a Bulldogs outfit missing their main playmaker. They should not complain. We were without Sadds, Lobby and Kev so did creditably to come away from this one with some goals and not conceding an avalanche. In the first half we made a few chances but couldn't capitalise. The Skipper hit the post when he should have scored. It wasn't until quite late on in the game that we got on the scoreboard. Trev did all the work himself, with his back to goal edging closer and then turning to fire past the keeper. Neil got on the scoreboard for the first time with a nicely taken goal before Trev wrapped up the scoring for us. Unfortunately the cause had long since been lost and it was a bit of a struggle. Plaino could make no headway against a tight and disciplined defence and in the end we had too few options. Euge was not at his best but still made us look better than maybe we were.


Following the week's break we now have Round 1 to think about and it is all happening at 8pm on Monday.

Looking forward to the new season.

Let me know if you want to play. Kev is away and I don't think Sadds is back from the UK yet so the rest of us need to show.

(16-JUN-08)

Last Post for Bugal Boys

D'OH! 7 Bugal Boys 4

The opposition we were expecting for this final round clash were replaced at late notice by the Bugal Boys and we sent them packing quite nicely. It was a good fun game with plenty of action at both ends. Still without Lobby and Sadds and with a few injuries being nursed along, this was a good performance. Trev introduced Neil to the line up and he had an active role. As he said at the end he gave away a couple of goals and one went in off his head so he would be surprised to be asked back. Stranger things have happened in D'OH's history and Neil showed enough on the ball to warrant follow-up appearances.

Trev opened the scoring and then Plaino bobbed up at the far post to pop in the rebound despite his doctor's advice to avoid the conflict and rest his finger after the kitchen mishap. He was to score another late on to make a satsifying double after his alarming injury. Trev weaved some magic down the right and found the Skipper in Plaino's spot at the far post for a tap in and we were in control. They showed a bit of fight and Euge's fresh bruises will attest to the efforts he put in to keep them out. One particular save lingers in the memory as Euge by reflex flung a hand out to divert the ball from a certain goal and to general astonishment it looked as if the hand was suddenly disembodied in the speed with which it moved compared to the rest of him.

The best was still to come and it was a Kev double within a minute. Firstly he rumbled forward brushing the pesky defenders off and let fly into the top corner with a vicious strike which the otherwise capable keeper can't have seen. To prove it was not a fluke, with his next involvement Kev had a shot from near half way on the side line which sped unerringly into the far top corner of the net - an absolute beauty which left Kev beaming with delight - and no wonder. We were safe before Trev scored his second.

Finals on Monday and we play ladder leader Bulldogs at 7.20pm. With Sadds unavailable and Lobby doubtful it looks like the same six as last time.

(02-JUN-08)

A good defeat

D'OH! 1 Van Basten 2

A courageous defeat this one and quite a puzzle how we failed to win it after making so many clear cut chances. A couple of things worked against us. Plaino pulling out after a kitchen mishap was an early blow and meant that no-one was going to get a breather during the game. Euge coming back from a nasty dislocation of his little finger (grossly omitted from last week's report) meant there was plenty of concern around the team and plenty of tape around Euge's fingers. How would he go? Would he be OK? Then Trev pulled up early in the second half after tying to run off a leg injury so our main strike force was out of action. So we were struggling just a bit. It didn’t help that their keeper played a blinder and that some of our shots hit woodwork or side netting.

The sides were well matched and they made mistakes just like we did. Kev's dinking run close to goal set up the chance for Trev to scoop in our only goal of the night but not long afterwards a quick break and a first time shot beat Euge and they were level. In the second half it took a nice turn and a low shot to the corner to beat Euge again and really there was not much he could have done about either, even with a fully functioning right pinky-finger.

When Trev admitted himself into nets to rest his injury it looked as though our last hope had gone, but it had the consequence of letting the Euge run free! Now the stage was set for some drama. Running cross-field to accept a kick in, Euge took a swing with his left foot …. and missed, much to the disappointment of everyone who knows him. Having seen him bury his only previous chance with considerable aplomb a couple of years ago, it was a shame to see the great man flunk the chance to let fly at the goals especially on a night when we needed a spark.

Next thing the ball clangs up into the roof and dislodges a light fitting. As the fluorescent bulb slides from its moorings and heads to inevitable oblivion on the indoor soccer court, Euge steps in and catches the flying light one handed and with a flourish. The delay while the fitting was reconnected was nothing to that which would have occurred had Euge dropped the bulb or let it smash on the ground. Perhaps on the night this was the high point for us? Sad really.

You could not question the effort, though as always there were question marks over the fitness and sometimes the skills. Everyone tried something and it was amazing that nothing came to anything. One of Lobby's shots was scrambled away via the upright. Kev fed a superb ball through for the skipper but only the side netting was hit. Trev came out again despite the leg but it just wasn't quite happening. A pity not to do better on Trev's 150th appearance for D'OH! Trev is the 5th and youngest player to reach the milestone. Talking of milestones, the skipper points out that last week was his 450th game - as you can guess the first, oldest and creakiest player to reach that point for D'OH!.

So we ran out of legs and time and finished at least one goal short.

Next week Lobby is away, so we need Sadds. The 8.40pm kick off against Raumplan should suit everyone - a sort of Goldilocks time - not too early and not too late.

(19-MAY-2008)

The Deluge

D'OH! 13 The Reds 5

A couple of weeks ago there was no trouble recollecting our goalscorers. There were none. This week there was a deluge of goals and it was a lot of fun. I'll try and remember them. Lobby got on the board first when he worried the 'keeper and a sheepish defence into letting one in. Next up Euge hurled the long ball to Kev's advantage and as the ball dropped over his shoulder Kev expertly deposited it into the far corner with a single touch for a goal well worth the celebration. The Skipper took on the defence and got a goal from each side of the pitch as we started to have a comfortable lead. Then it was Trev's turn to show his wares as he drifted forward with the ball stuck to his boot and slid it past the keeper in clinical fashion. Then he did it again. Just before half time the skipper was one-on-one with the keeper and slipped it between his feet and we had 7 to their 2.

In the second half we continued to torment them, but with less control over our finishing - the game became a bit scrappy and our pledge to keep a second half clean sheet was broken within a minute. Lobby put one up into the top corner for the best goal of the half and the skipper got another when they all stopped for a substitution. Trev got two and Kev the last for our baker's dozen, but how they came about escapes me. We conceded a couple as well but with such an advantage on the scoreboard, it was always comfortable for us.

Euge picked up his customary bruises and had a bit to do but was always in control. Plaino was disappointed not to get on the scoresheet but saw more of the action than normal. All in all a good day for the lads.

Next week the game is at 6pm against Van Basten. Let me know if you are showing up for the early kickoff.

(12-MAY-2008)

Back to winning ways

D'OH 5 ALBERT PARK RANGERS 4

It took 27 seconds for the lads to wipe the bitter memories of last weeks failure to score clean from our minds.

From this point on, our opposition tightened up in their defence and made it difficult for us to score. At the other end of the court, our defence was proving strong in terms of being able to force the error and turn the ball over. On the half time buzzer, the score was 2-2, we were playing some good football, however we knew we still had a tough game on our hands. Trev ended up with both goals before the break.

The second half, Lobby scored a customary goal to see us go up 3-2, with 10 mins to go Albert Park started a mini revival, adding two quick goalsto go 4-3 up. Trev scored the next to get his hatrick and we were back on level terms and complete the win Kev scored a cracker for 8 mtrs out which rocketed into the top corner.

With the final siren sounding, we knew we fought out a tough win. With Saddles still on the injury list and The Skipper standing down for a week to rest his knee (or was it to recover from the Logies and Kate Ritchie's big win) we did well to run out the whole game without any substitutions. Trev walked away with three goals, whilst Kev and Lobby both managed a goal each. Plaino hassled his opposition and managed a number of turnovers whilst Eugene was again solid in defence. The opposition made many attacks and it was Euge who managed to stop their forwards from scoring where many would not have been close.

7.20pm game this week against The Reds. As usual, please advise the skipper of your availability.

(05-MAY-2008)

A New Low

D'OH! 0 Bulldogs 5

We failed to score. 517 games into the life of the club and for the first time we did not find the back of the net. The opposition did of course which means we lost the match. The defeat we can handle, but surrendering one of the longest held records will be hard to stomach. It is not as if this was the best team we have ever played, or that we were undermanned (the loss of Sadds to injury notwithstanding), or that we played hopelessly. In fact, we played alright, made plenty of chances and had numerous shots on target which is not always the case with us. We just found a keeper at the height of his form a stubborn defence and all on a night when things did not go our way. Still hard to believe that nothing we did resulted in a goal.

We let them score a few easy ones after being turned in the attacking area and Euge did not have one of his better days. None of us did. Still we would have done enough to score a few times under normal circumstances. Trev was back and he and Lobby peppered the goals in the first half with no reward. Kev battled hard without giving a freekick away, hardly, and Plaino worked from end to end without having a lot of impact. The skipper hammered a few freekicks into the wall so that some of their players would have had something to remember the night by and a lot of huff and puff was expended. The sub did not help us and the lack of sub did not hinder them.

Tonight's game is at 10pm but this is the last of the late kick offs for us for a bit. We are playing Albert Park Rangers and we are hoping to score. Then we are hoping to win.

(28-APR-2008)

Banana Smoothies

D'OH! 3 Junior Bananas 8

Embarrassing. Would have been worse but for late strikes by Plaino and Sadds, but even at the end the scoreline had us blushing. A huge anticlimax in our heralded rematch against one of our oldest adversaries. They came into the game complaining of being in a lowly spot on the ladder and here were we pushing to the top. How are the mighty fallen. We were outplayed and were suddenly back to the darkest days of our final season in Division One where everything we tried turned to rubbish and we had a defence like a colander.

In contrast they looked a polished outfit and cam up with some stunning finishes, particularly in the second half and poor Euge was trudging to the back of the net all too often. The sort of performance we have to put behind us especially as we play league leaders Bulldogs on Monday night at 9.20pm. We need another form reversal. On the positive side Sadds tried all night to get us going but it wasn't to be. The rest of us played but that was about it. Bob had an outstanding game in nets but still conceded a Plaino double so will be angry with himself. At least he didn’t score this time - I'm not sure we could have coped with his celebrations on a night when so much was going wrong for us.

They had pretty much the same line up that we were used to and so did we - but we were so far below our recent best it wasn't funny.

Anyway, see you on Monday I suppose?

(21-APR-08)

Cruising

D'OH! 7 Lightning Strikes 2

To only concede two goals when Euge was not playing is a good effort, and one of those was a deflection off the ample backside of one of their players so even Euge would have struggled with that one. The other goal was a pretty smart individual effort but otherwise they hardly tested our stand-in keepers. We took control of the game early. The boys worked it wide to Lobby who let fly with his left. Strangely the keeper turned away as the shot came in, in the way the scared kid in the school team does so that he ends up with his back to the shot facing the net. Of course the goal was scored. Then we saw Sadds drive one in and then, in attempted and creditable imitation, Plaino struck one crisply from 5 metres out into the bottom corner. The question is, will he continue to surprise us with his finishing?

Lobby followed up his opening goal with another couple to complete a second hattrick in a row and Sadds added to his first half strike for a nice double. Sadds worked out that the best way to attack was to play a one-two and he showed again and again how effective this can be against a sub-par defence. Others were rewarded for his efforts but we cruised to the win despite Kev and the skipper not troubling the scorers.

This weeks game is at 10.40pm again but the incentive is that it is against Junior Bananas - a team we have played a million times, but not since 3rd July 2006.

Let me know if you are available.

(14-APR-08)

Vivid memories

D'OH! 9 Columbia FC 5

It might have been two weeks ago but aspects of this game are vividly etched on the brain so it seems like it happened just now. There was the start for example. Plaino touched to Lobby who shot and the ball went in the bottom cormer without the keeper doing much to stop it. One of the fastest goals ever. Then in the second half there was Euge hurling the ball to Lobby who nodded it on to Plaino. That Plaino controlled the ball with apparent ease and then slotted it, is a source of amazement even now.

Thank goodness Damian was on holiday here and available, for without him we would have been down to 4 men. The big man did his job and so nearly scored his 105th goal in his 105th game. It was a Euge bowl out again and Damo turned his man on the half way line and let fly with his left from the edge of the court. The ball sizzled past the far post. With the last touch he almost managed to get a shot away but it was not to be and the siren went.

Having discovered that their keeper did not know what he was doing, Lobby terrorised him with shots all night. Finishing with 4 goals he was our top scorer, with the skipper picking up 3 and Plaino 2. It was a shocking performance from their man between the sticks and obviously the difference between the teams. Euge had a good night - keeping them out despite a defence that was fairly leaky at times. A normal day at the office for him.

The good news is we have strung a few results together without Trev being around and missing Sadds and Kev last time out. With the boys back we can look forward with optimism to tonight's 10.40pm kick off. Did I say "optimism"? Probably not the right word for the prospect of a late night kick off on the first night of the working week. Never fear - I am sure our opponents - Lightning Stikes - will be more worried than we are.

Let me know whether you are playing.

(31-MAR-08)

Hot Work

D’OH! 3 Raumplan 1

It’s hard to believe that less than two weeks ago we played in sweltering conditions at 8pm in our latest indoor encounter, when nowadays it is not unusual to have the heating on. Such is life in Melbourne. We won though – despite the conditions – and perhaps having a sub really helped us as the breaks were certainly appreciated. It took a long time for the deadlock to be broken, with both keepers doing their bit to keep the scoreboard from ticking over. In the end Sadds sent the skipper in on goal and a touch took the ball into the far side of the net. At half time it had been the only score. In the second half we continued to pressurise and the skipper had a speculative shot at the time when Sadds was running across goal with a defender. In the confusion, the otherwise innocuous shot found its way past the keeper and we were two up.

Euge was finally beaten shortly after, but the last word went to Kev. He collected the ball in the D, made an expert turn and hooked it in with his left foot for a smartly taken goal. It had been hot work but satisfying.

This week’s game is at 8pm and we are back in the pits. No prospect of a heatwave though so more comfortable conditions for the lads. With Trev still away and Kev recovering from his Run for the Kids we will need to be on good form to win against Columbia FC, whoever they are.

(17-MAR-2008)

Back to the Old Days

D'OH! 6 Van Basten 5

Old adversaries and a game to please the purists - full of cut and thrust, played in a good spirit and plenty of goalmouth action. In the first half a lot of that action was at the end we were attacking but in the second half it was our goal which was under siege. Thanks to an awesome display from Euge we managed to hang on the slender lead we held all night but with a bit more luck for them it might have been a result of a different kind.

Trev was forced to pull out so it was a minimum 5 that took the court for D'OH! It would have been easier if we had had a sub, but as we played it seemed that the burden was being shared and as some took a breather others picked up the slack. At various times we all struggled but true to our heritage we stuck at it and came out of it with a good win. First half highlights included Plaino winning the ball in attack and working it to the skipper for a goal and Euge pulling off a dramatic double save before the third attempt came in and Sadds somehow got his head in the way to deflect it wide and we had kept them out again. The best moment of the half came when Euge's bowl out went to Kev and thence to the skipper. As the play slowed, Sadds made a dash across the court and picked up the pass heading to the sideline at pace. Turning, Sadds crossed to the far post where Plaino was lurking in his inimitable fashion for a simple tap in - it was a magic moment. The skipper and Sadds had scored other goals so we led 4-2 at the break.

In the second half we were under pressure as Van Basten threw themselves into attack. Plaino's ability to get in the way of the defence proved effective again as he worried them into coughing up the ball close to goal and the skipper was on hand to complete his hat trick. With them attacking we were likely to get more opportunities, but only Kev took his, blasting into the back of the net when he found himself one-on-one with the keeper. Hard to pick out Euge's best save but the reflex one from the flick-on header was right up there.

Still no news on the time for next week's game but keep the evening free. When I know, so will you.

(25-FEB-2008)

The Skipper Switched Sides

D'OH! 5 Scratch Team 2

Strange circumstances last week when the scheduled opposition failed to show and a scratch team was cobbled together to at least give the lads a run around. The skipper opted to start with the opposition and refused to be substituted, evidently quite enjoying being up against his teammates for a change. It was a good game played slightly below full pace and there was a healthy regard for the other protagonist in the challenge so that there was no danger of getting hurt. (Thanks Kev, for going easy on us).

It was end to end stuff and the opposition did surprisingly well in the first half, holding D'OH! to just a couple of goals and making plenty of openings themselves. Not bad for a team thrown together at no notice.

Plaino was given too much space and opened the scoring after a series of saves by the bearded ref. Trev was the main danger up front and he ended up with a hattrick. One goal resulted from the pressure he put the skipper under in defence - the latter's attempted clearance rebounding off Trev's leg and into the net. At the death Trev seemed certain to have his fourth but with the keeper beaten, Trev's shot was kept out by the skipper's hand and we had a penalty. Up steps Euge to take the spot kick after the siren has sounded and perhaps double his goals tally for D'OH!? Unfortunately the bearded ref was too good and Euge had his penalty saved. Nevermind. Not as bad as the skipper's earlier miss when given an open goal by the same bearded ref who was now performing brilliantly as rush-goalie. Oh well, as determind at an earlier juncture, any goal scored for the opposition won't count in the stats.

Tonight's game is against Van Basten at the ungodly hour of 10.40pm. As it is now 9.54pm and I am still at home I'd better stop this, get changed and get down to the venue. See you in a minute!

(18-FEB-2008)

Closing down the opposition

D'OH 9 def Albert Park Ranger 2

We took the court this week without Skipper, another 10pm game. Going down a grade and you get the late shift more often by the looks of it.

It has been some time, since we had 7 fit bodies ready to play days before a game, so our gallant Skipper took his turn to enjoy a night off, and to rest a dodgy knee.

So we rocked up for game 2 Div 2 knowing we had blown a brilliant 2nd phase comeback the week before, we vowed not to fall into the same fate again.
Plaino returned after having not played since before Xmas and his fitness told, mind you the rest periods on the bench by all the guys did increase as the match went on. Plaino did not find the net on the night, but he did provide an annoying presence up front and opened up the defence with many dummy runs and his excessive calling for the ball, which I don't think the other guys heard too often.

Within 5 mins we had a two goal lead, one each to Sadds and Trevchenko, however after that we turned on cruised control or was it had someone turned up the heat in the stadium,as we fatigued beyond comprehension. With 10 min to go on the clock, The Euge was caught with his feet grounded at the near post and stood there watching the ball flying thru his legs, they had one back.

Not long after, we reverted back to a style of play reminiscent of the week before and the ball was lost at half way by the last defender and they countered 2 on 1, scores were level. We looked lackluster and without purpose, shots came from way out and little holes started to appear in defence. My thought was here we go again. Thank God for the half time siren.

Well the mood at the break was well "S--- what is wrong with us". So it was decided to just get the game over with and search for answers after the game.

We kicked off, and they certainly thought they had us beat, and frankly that did cross my mind as well. Obviously nobody told the rest of our boys and in good old D'oh fashion we fought back, and how.

In a magic three minute period, we had 4 more in the back of the net and soon after the 5th appeared. Two rushed goals from Sadds, who took on the keeper and won the hard ball gets, two traditional Lobby toe pokes and a dogged run and finish by Trev saw us open up a good lead. They continued to pepper our goals as well, but the defence was solid and much more alert than
in the first half. Had we broken the back of our opposition, well the answer was yes, they started to lose heart, and Sadds and Kev made them pay with two more goals.

Thats how it ended, 9-2 and a first up win in Div 2. All round a more polished performance from the lads, the mood certainly did pick up at the after game wrapup and our resolve is to keep this momentum going forward.

Next weeks game is at 7.20pm against I don't know as I didn't take a draw with me first week. Skipper will be back so if any of you apart from Plaino who want to take a week off please let Giles or myself know by Monday morning or the Skipper will have to draw an unlikey participant to sit out.

I will taking my week off on the 3rd March as Golf will again keep me from attending so I draw tabs for that night.

Again well done lads and I see/hear from you next week.

(11-FEB-2008)

A Game of 3 Phases

D'OH! 7 Bulldogs 9

Off to less than a flying start in the new division in what was an up and down performance. In the first half we looked like a team that had been promoted beyond its ability (rather than one that has voluntarily, if prematurely, dropped a division) as we struggled to do anything coherent. Only Lobby's well taken goal from the left wing gave us anything to be pleased about as we conceded 4 and looked a bit of a shambles.

In the second half we started to play and we turned in a 10 minute performance which was quite outstanding. Trev finished off a neat move, Kev beat his man on the left as Lobby had done in the previous half and drilled one in, and the skipper slammed in a freekick from some way out. Not to be left out, Sadds got on the scoresheet so we now had 5 individual scorers. We were irresistible and Lobby worked a move for Trev to grab his second and we had turned 1-4 into 6-4.

Unfortunately we had spent our energy and they started to come back at us. Some quick-fire scoring put them 7-6 up before Sadds equalised for us and it was exciting. In the end they edged to 8-7 and in our effort to equalise it was not surprising to concede again in the final moments.

A bit disappointing to be defeated first time out, but there is plenty of time to assert ourselves in Division 2.

Next week's game is at 10pm again against Albert Park Rangers. Never heard of them. In a couple more weeks we play Van Basten and we followed Bananas on to the court on Monday night. At least they had a win so there is hope.

If Plaino is fit we might have 7 in which case I will rest my niggly knee and Euge with the dreaded job of writing a report on our latest adventures.

(04-FEB-2008)

Another Premiership as our Finale

D'OH! 5 Teabaggers 1

A couple of weeks ago, the lads played their final game in the top division, and perhaps predictably after recognising that we can no longer cut it in the top flight, we won comfortably to secure the silverware that is the Pool B premiership. So we have proven that over the last two seasons we are indisputably the 5th best side in Division 1. We brushed the Teabaggers aside with a consummate display, conceding the single goal late on after we were 4 up and home. They were not up to much and because we were allowed time on the ball and to build from the back, we reverted to our familiar style of play and were very effective. Trev and Sadds starred, with Trev picking up a hattrick and Sadds scoring one and seeming to have a big hand in the others which must have edged him against Trev in the man of the match stakes.

Lobby contributed the final goal after winning the ball on our own dead ball line and venturing forward. As he swept towards the opposition goal the remaining defenders seemed more intent on marking other players than trying to stop Lobby so he was only eventually slowed by his own lack of puff. Breaking into the opposition half he unleashed the trademark toe-poke which zipped past a startled keeper and allowed Lobby the break to get his breath back. With Plaino missing out because of his persistent ankle injury, Kev, Euge and Giles made up the rest of the victorious team most of which repaired to the Cricketers Arms for a couple of swifties to mark the Premiership and the end of an era. Thanks also to Mark Lockwood for being the crowd in the second half.

Tonight we begin our new life in the second tier of the competition and interestingly, our first encounter is with Bulldogs who used to play in Division One as well. We'll see how that one goes. The 10pm kick off is at MacRobertson as the annual exodus takes place to make way for the Grand Prix. If Bernie Ecclestone has his way, and Melbourne loses the Grand Prix after 2010, it may be only a couple more years of disruption for us.

One for the Ages

D'OH! 7 Dizzy 6

There are some things that are hard to explain in life, and the result on Monday night was one such thing. After all, you can't expect to compete in a game of 5 a-side when you turn up with 4 players and you are lacking your regular keeper. Then you see that the opposition has 7 players and therefore each of their players gets the opportunity for a breather quite often. The ref was sticking to the rules which state that each player must have played 5 games in the season so we were not able to bring anyone in from another team. I suggested that his inflexibility might mean we would be wasting everyone's time, but in the end our failure to gather enough players and his refusal to allow any deputies, set the scene for one of the most memorable performances in our history. So it goes.

The first surprise was to take the lead after hastily discussing revised tactics involving taking pot-shots from distance and using a zone defence rather than our habitual man-on-man marking. Good approach work from Sadds and the skipper ended with Sadds crossing and a tap-in for the skipper - so much for long range efforts. It wasn't long before they were adopting the strategy we talked about, and started shooting from distance. Our zone defence had had an effect - they had no idea how to approach it so just shot from anywhere. Then we won a corner and Kev laid it back for the skipper to ping it into the roof of the net - we've seen it before and we will surely see it again. As the half progressed, they found the way to goal and also got a breakaway as we struggled not to be all sucked in to our own attacks leaving us defenceless. It was 3-2 to them at halftime and we were proud to have competed, but we were puffing and the prospect of another half of high intensity aerobic exercise late at night was not exactly something to look forward to.

The second half had not really started when their bloke smashed a shot into the top corner from the kick off and Sadds picked the ball out of the net. None of us had really seen it. Soon it was the skipper's turn to be in nets and almost immediately a ball worked its way through his legs and we might have been overrun. Then Trev rushed off down the wing with the voices of his teammates ringing in his ears - "You're on your own!" Trev didn't need any help as he blasted a goal on the run - magnificent. Then a nice bit of interpassing close to their goal ended with the skipper providing Trev with a simple finish and we were playing good stuff and keeping them at bay and making them worry. Their defence was now as ragged as their attack and we were in a ruthless mood. What if we could win? I think Trev got another goal but I might be mistaken. (let me know). Just before the end the skipper skipped away and his shot was deflected in and it was all square as the time ticked out.

The last thing we wanted was extra time but on it came and we've been there before. Many times and with the right result most of the time. Not long into the first period their defender passed the ball back to his keeper who lost it between his legs and suddenly there was a risk it might go into the net. Diving to grab the ball, the keeper made the interchange into a back pass and thus a free kick was awarded to us close to goal. They crowded in front but when the ball came back to him, Trev lifted it high and hard into the net and the game was over. We had booked ourselves another Grand Final berth and guaranteed more trophies.

Awesome.

So we played with 4 and won a semi final. They should be ashamed of themselves.

Next week we play Teabaggers at 7.20pm. This will be our last game in Division One as, after quite a bit of soul-searching, it has been decided that we should let the young kids alone and go and play in the second division. Let's jump before we are pushed. Of course we leave behind a great record and we don't do it lightly. There is a realisation for some that our best days might be behind us and you can't take too many floggings without looking at other ways of enjoying yourself on Monday nights. I personally don't think the standard will drop off that much and I would love to cross swords with Bananas again. I believe there is a lot to look forward to.

Let's set it up by winning on Monday night and winning yet another premiership.

(14-JAN-2008)